Okey and I are so excited that our home study was finally completed in October!
Now we wait...
Many have been asking "When?":
There is no guarantee. Some wait weeks. Some wait years.
We have submitted a profile book to each of the three offices in North Carolina. As expectant families come to Bethany Christian Services they will be looking through profile books if they choose the adoption plan. So pray that our profile book stands out. Pray that the birth mother takes good care of herself so that her and the baby are healthy.
Others have asked "How much?":
The total for our adoption is $20,000.
Why? Costs includes professional services for adoptive parents (home study, orentation & meetings, case management, ect.), professional services for birth parents (counseling, case management, correspondance, ect.), some birth parent expenses, newborn care and services, legal expenses...
We are applying for grants and planning different fundraisers. Pray that God will bless us financially during this process so we have little to no debt trying to expand our family.
Thank you to all of you who have continued to support us during this journey!
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
History
I have sat down many a times to write this but the words seem to escape me each time.
I don't entirely know why I am going to share all this but I guess it is mainly so that others know where Okey and I are coming from. Also I want to be able to help others who might be struggling with the same thing. Sometimes it helps to know you are not the only one going through something.
Okey and I knew we wanted children from the very beginning. We never thought that we would be led through this hard road. There was a time where I couldn't even think of it without tearing up. Now I am more understanding of our situation and understand better why God has led us here, so the tears come less often. The pain is still deep but I know that through pain, great things can happen.
Pretty soon after our marriage we began trying to conceive. I knew that I would probably need a little more help from doctors in that area so we just trusted in God for timing. Later I sought out doctor help, and then later I had to visit a specialist. For several months I went through treatments. At the same time we were constantly seeking God's guidance. We knew we wanted to adopt at some point in our marriage. We just needed to know when. We didn't think that it would happen for our first child. But that is God's plan. It's funny how we plan our lives out and then we lift our heads one day and realize God wants us on a different road. One day (I wish it had been sooner given what I was going through) I knew that I needed to stop treatments and start the adoption process. I think Okey knew sooner than I did, but wanted me to hear it from God for myself. I loved the idea of adopting long before I met Okey. It wasn't in MY plan though until years from now after we had our own biological children. As most women, I long to experience that side of motherhood. Well, that's not what God has for me (at least not right now).
I say all of this because it has been so difficult for me some days. Honestly when I was going through the difficulty of conceiving, I was angry. I couldn't stand to be around other pregnant ladies or young children. It was just too painful. It all was a reminder of my loss and lack. It seemed that everybody around me was getting lucky in the baby department but us. I could tell Okey was hurt too, but it is different for men.
When you are in the moment of all the pain, it seems nobody else has been there. I learned that others have been and are going through similar situations. That is why I am sharing our story. I want to be able to help other women who have or are experiencing infertility. So many times I felt alone. Nobody should feel that way. I learned to trust God to bring me through those dark and painful times. If you are in a similar situation, I want you to know that God is there with out stretched arms ready to pick you up and bring you forward. I've learned that this entire journey is making me a stronger person, creating a stronger bond between Okey and I, and best of all letting me see that God is in control. It could have easily done the opposite, but Okey and I have learned to let God lead which has made all the difference.
God heals and comforts. It takes time but we are trusting in God and finding that this journey is rewarding. I can see that this is where we need to be. I am appreciative of all the prayers and kind, uplifting words we have received.
Okey and I are here for anyone who needs to know you aren't the only one.
I don't entirely know why I am going to share all this but I guess it is mainly so that others know where Okey and I are coming from. Also I want to be able to help others who might be struggling with the same thing. Sometimes it helps to know you are not the only one going through something.
Okey and I knew we wanted children from the very beginning. We never thought that we would be led through this hard road. There was a time where I couldn't even think of it without tearing up. Now I am more understanding of our situation and understand better why God has led us here, so the tears come less often. The pain is still deep but I know that through pain, great things can happen.
Pretty soon after our marriage we began trying to conceive. I knew that I would probably need a little more help from doctors in that area so we just trusted in God for timing. Later I sought out doctor help, and then later I had to visit a specialist. For several months I went through treatments. At the same time we were constantly seeking God's guidance. We knew we wanted to adopt at some point in our marriage. We just needed to know when. We didn't think that it would happen for our first child. But that is God's plan. It's funny how we plan our lives out and then we lift our heads one day and realize God wants us on a different road. One day (I wish it had been sooner given what I was going through) I knew that I needed to stop treatments and start the adoption process. I think Okey knew sooner than I did, but wanted me to hear it from God for myself. I loved the idea of adopting long before I met Okey. It wasn't in MY plan though until years from now after we had our own biological children. As most women, I long to experience that side of motherhood. Well, that's not what God has for me (at least not right now).
I say all of this because it has been so difficult for me some days. Honestly when I was going through the difficulty of conceiving, I was angry. I couldn't stand to be around other pregnant ladies or young children. It was just too painful. It all was a reminder of my loss and lack. It seemed that everybody around me was getting lucky in the baby department but us. I could tell Okey was hurt too, but it is different for men.
When you are in the moment of all the pain, it seems nobody else has been there. I learned that others have been and are going through similar situations. That is why I am sharing our story. I want to be able to help other women who have or are experiencing infertility. So many times I felt alone. Nobody should feel that way. I learned to trust God to bring me through those dark and painful times. If you are in a similar situation, I want you to know that God is there with out stretched arms ready to pick you up and bring you forward. I've learned that this entire journey is making me a stronger person, creating a stronger bond between Okey and I, and best of all letting me see that God is in control. It could have easily done the opposite, but Okey and I have learned to let God lead which has made all the difference.
God heals and comforts. It takes time but we are trusting in God and finding that this journey is rewarding. I can see that this is where we need to be. I am appreciative of all the prayers and kind, uplifting words we have received.
Okey and I are here for anyone who needs to know you aren't the only one.
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
More Waiting...
Our home study is done now. We are just waiting on the paper work to be finalized and turned in by our social worker. It should be all complete within the next couple of weeks, then we will be officially "waiting". This means that we will be waiting for a mother and/or father to choose us. In the mean time I need to plan some fundraisers and apply for grants. There won't be much else to do other than fundraising and waiting patiently.
It seems that we have been waiting forever for a child of our own. Years and years! In God's timing! He has molding and shaping us into the perfect pair of parents for our children. I get tears in my eyes when I think of holding that precious baby. I love him/her already and I haven't even met them. <3
It seems that we have been waiting forever for a child of our own. Years and years! In God's timing! He has molding and shaping us into the perfect pair of parents for our children. I get tears in my eyes when I think of holding that precious baby. I love him/her already and I haven't even met them. <3
Friday, July 20, 2012
Home Study
Yet again too much time has passed since my last update.
Okey and I are going through the home study process. This includes 3 meetings with our social worker. We ended up working with the Greensboro office since they were less busy at the time.
Many people have asked us what a home study is like and what do they ask. We meet with the social worker and discuss the process, any questions we may have, and we respond to questions from the social worker. It seems that we have already answered the questions sometime during the tons of paperwork we did earlier.
During our last meeting we had individual interviews. We were asked questions such as "what was your childhood like", "how do you two handle conflict", "what will discipline be like in your home", and other questions about the child we would like. It feels odd to say yes or no to certain situations a child may go through. It feels weird to say no to something when I almost feel like I shouldn't be picky or choosy. I feel like I shouldn't say no to any circumstance. For some reason it makes me feel like I am denying a child a home.
Well we are almost complete with the home study. One more meeting which the social worker will visit our home and then meet with our pastor. They have told us they are just looking to be sure the home is safe. Afterwards she has 30 days to complete and turn in paperwork. In that time we will be able to review the report before it is finalized. After the report is completed, Okey and I will be "waiting". They tell us that this is the most difficult time because there is no longer any paperwork to keep us busy and we will just be waiting for good news. I know I will be happy when there isn't any more paperwork involved, but I know that the waiting will be hard.
Pray for patience for Okey and I. Pray for the birth parents to make good choices during the pregnancy and for a happy and healthy baby. Pray for strength for the birth parents to make the best decision for them and their baby.
I know God has a baby for us and is just waiting for HIS right time.
Okey and I are going through the home study process. This includes 3 meetings with our social worker. We ended up working with the Greensboro office since they were less busy at the time.
Many people have asked us what a home study is like and what do they ask. We meet with the social worker and discuss the process, any questions we may have, and we respond to questions from the social worker. It seems that we have already answered the questions sometime during the tons of paperwork we did earlier.
During our last meeting we had individual interviews. We were asked questions such as "what was your childhood like", "how do you two handle conflict", "what will discipline be like in your home", and other questions about the child we would like. It feels odd to say yes or no to certain situations a child may go through. It feels weird to say no to something when I almost feel like I shouldn't be picky or choosy. I feel like I shouldn't say no to any circumstance. For some reason it makes me feel like I am denying a child a home.
Well we are almost complete with the home study. One more meeting which the social worker will visit our home and then meet with our pastor. They have told us they are just looking to be sure the home is safe. Afterwards she has 30 days to complete and turn in paperwork. In that time we will be able to review the report before it is finalized. After the report is completed, Okey and I will be "waiting". They tell us that this is the most difficult time because there is no longer any paperwork to keep us busy and we will just be waiting for good news. I know I will be happy when there isn't any more paperwork involved, but I know that the waiting will be hard.
Pray for patience for Okey and I. Pray for the birth parents to make good choices during the pregnancy and for a happy and healthy baby. Pray for strength for the birth parents to make the best decision for them and their baby.
I know God has a baby for us and is just waiting for HIS right time.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Wow! I can't believe it's already May. I was just telling Okey last night that I haven't updated the blog in a while. We have just been so busy with all that life has thrown at us.
It's been about 5 months since we answered God's call to adopt. I don't want to sound impatient but it sometimes feels like this process is just dragging along. I just keep saying "It's all in God's timing." Don't get me wrong, I truly believe it. It can just be hard sometimes to be patient, especially when it has been something we have desired for years now.
A month or so ago, we were able to go to our adoption agency's orientation meeting and then to an infant care class at a local hospital. It was an amazing weekend. During the orientation meeting we were able to experience God's presence. It was so wonderful to meet other couples going through the process. We were even able to speak with adoptive parents and one birth mother. Listening to their experiences helped ease our worries and see how God can work through this adoption journey.
During the infant care class, we were able to speak to the two instructors about what God was doing in our lives. One of the ladies teaching the class was even able to tell Okey what his name meant. Apparently it is very common in Nigeria and means "Gift of God" or "Gift from God".
I don't even know how to put into words everything that we experienced or felt that weekend. God is good.
It's been about 5 months since we answered God's call to adopt. I don't want to sound impatient but it sometimes feels like this process is just dragging along. I just keep saying "It's all in God's timing." Don't get me wrong, I truly believe it. It can just be hard sometimes to be patient, especially when it has been something we have desired for years now.
A month or so ago, we were able to go to our adoption agency's orientation meeting and then to an infant care class at a local hospital. It was an amazing weekend. During the orientation meeting we were able to experience God's presence. It was so wonderful to meet other couples going through the process. We were even able to speak with adoptive parents and one birth mother. Listening to their experiences helped ease our worries and see how God can work through this adoption journey.
During the infant care class, we were able to speak to the two instructors about what God was doing in our lives. One of the ladies teaching the class was even able to tell Okey what his name meant. Apparently it is very common in Nigeria and means "Gift of God" or "Gift from God".
I don't even know how to put into words everything that we experienced or felt that weekend. God is good.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Wine & Design Fundraiser
I am so grateful for our friends and family. The out pour of love and support has been amazing!
Here is info for our first fundraising event.
Wine & Design Fundraiser:
Go to their website (Raleigh location) and check out the calendar.
Click February 25th and choose "Hannah Wilson FUNDRAISER".
You should be able to put your info and pay there.
Sign up as soon as you can. Wine and Design will donate a portion of the proceeds to our adoption fund. Don't miss out on the fun!! BYOB
http://paintpartiesstudios.com/raleigh/calendar
Here is info for our first fundraising event.
Wine & Design Fundraiser:
Go to their website (Raleigh location) and check out the calendar.
Click February 25th and choose "Hannah Wilson FUNDRAISER".
You should be able to put your info and pay there.
Sign up as soon as you can. Wine and Design will donate a portion of the proceeds to our adoption fund. Don't miss out on the fun!! BYOB
http://paintpartiesstudios.com/raleigh/calendar
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